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Visit people only once a year.”. — Victor Borge. 13. ”The main reason Santa is so jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live.”. — George ...Sep 2, 2022 · 13. View More Replies... View more comments. #23. A man walks into an enchanted forest and tries to cut down a talking tree. "You can't cut me down," the tree exclaims, "I'm a talking tree!" The man responds, "You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue." Report. Quotes tagged as "adulthood" Showing 1-30 of 565. “Try not to become a man of success. Rather become a man of value.”. ― Albert Einstein. tags: adulthood , success , value. 7001 likes. Like. “Adults are just obsolete children and the hell with them.”. ― Dr. Seuss.Turning eighteen means that you’re mature enough to realize that you don’t need material objects to be happy. Therefore, you can let me have your gifts. I’m glad that you’re about to turn 18- so are mom and dad, but they’re just ready for you to move out. 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Melanie White. “There are 17 more shopping days until Christmas. Jan 5, 2023 · Inspiring Funny Quotes. Here are a few inspiring funny quotes. “Bad decisions make good stories.”. — Ellis Vidler. “The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.”. — Andy Rooney. “Stories of imagination tend to upset those without one.”. — Terry Pratchett. “See the world like a big wardrobe. Apr 13, 2022 - Explore Mara's board "Funny adult quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about funny, funny quotes, quotes. Jul 29, 2021 · Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.”. – Michael Scott, The Office. “All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”. – Charles M. Schulz. “Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are.”. – Will Ferrell. This collection of fun and funny quotes will hopefully bring a smile to your face, and can …Eugene Mirman. 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I haven’t posted a selfie in a while but I still am very cute just to keep you updated.Quotes About Being Single. 1. “My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese; most of it’s missing, and what’s there stinks.”. — Joan Rivers. 2. “I am so romantic, sometimes I think I ...80 Funny Quotes To Make You Smile Written by Shutterfly Community …Melanie White. Woman's Day/Getty Images. "Remember, your Valentine's card shows you care enough to send the very best, even though you're too lazy to put it in your own words." 11.1. “First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.” —F. Scott Fitzgerald. 2. “I’m still the same person I was last year—now I’m just hungover ...200 Short Jokes That Are Funny. 1. What do kids play when their mom is using the phone? Bored games. 2. What do you call an ant who fights crime? A vigilANTe! 3.Apr 9, 2021 · These funny teenage quotes are perfect for you. 18. That awkward moment when your crush asks you who your crush is. 19. I may be crazy but crazy is better than stupid. 20. Pretty rude that it’s not Friday, but ok. 21. I haven’t posted a selfie in a while but I still am very cute just to keep you updated. Short funny Christmas quotes. “At Christmas, tea is compulsory. Relatives are optional.”. — Robert Godden. “Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city ...
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Milton Berle. “Christmas is a box of tree ornaments that have become part of the family.”—. Charles M. Schulz. “It’s easier to feel a little more spiritual with a couple of bucks in your pocket.”. — Craig Ferguson. “I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can’t wait to exchange.”. — Henny Youngman.Apr 13, 2022 - Explore Mara's board "Funny adult quotes" on Pinterest. See more ideas about funny, funny quotes, quotes.Apr 9, 2021 · These funny teenage quotes are perfect for you. 18. That awkward moment when your crush asks you who your crush is. 19. I may be crazy but crazy is better than stupid. 20. Pretty rude that it’s not Friday, but ok. 21. I haven’t posted a selfie in a while but I still am very cute just to keep you updated. Oct 23, 2021 · 11. “I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.”. — David Lee Roth. 12. “Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see ... Discover a large collection of popular adult coloring pages that you can print and use right now for free. We feature a variety of adult coloring pages in various themes, including mandalas, animals, landscapes, patterns, and more. Coloring pages are a popular pastime for adults as a form of relaxation and stress relief while being a form of ...Funny Random Sayings. “A good sermon should be like a woman’s skirt: short enough to rouse the interest, but long enough to cover the essentials.”. – Ronald Knox. “When on the ladder of success, don’t let boys look up your dress!”. – Unknown. “Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ” – Louis ...When trying to clean up a dirty Gary, SpongeBob takes soap out of the bathtub. He then proceeds to show them to Gary, explaining to "not drop the doubloons" while winking. It was an obvious reference to the more well-known phrase to not drop the soap, especially when in a prison shower.Oct 30, 2023 - Explore Jess Ihde's board "ADULTS ONLY ;)", followed by 118 people on Pinterest. See more ideas about funny quotes, bones funny, adults only.Welcome to “100 Adult Jokes: Laugh Out Loud with Puns & One-Liners,” the ultimate collection that’s guaranteed to bring a smile to your face and a chuckle to your day! In this space, we serve up a smorgasbord of jests, from the witty to the wacky, that’s perfect for your adult sense of humor. Get ready to dive into a world where ...Are you tired of sending the same old traditional birthday cards year after year? Do you want to add some laughter and excitement to your loved one’s special day? Look no further t...13 Cute Halloween Quotes. “There are three things I have learned never to discuss with people: religion, politics, and the Great Pumpkin.”. – Linus, It’s The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. “When the witches go riding, and black cats are seen, the moon laughs and whispers. ’tis near Halloween.”. Best Famous Funny Birthday Quotes. "You know you’ve aged when you read events you lived in a history book." ―Will Ferrell. "Middle age is when you still believe you’ll feel better in the morning." ―Bob Hope.Funny drinking quotes like this one remind us of all these bad dad jokes from twitter you can’t help but laugh at. 15 / 32. Getty Images, rd.com. Ernest Hemingway.